Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that He may lift you up in due time. 1 Peter 5:6
One morning, back when my kids were probably seven, five and one, the stars magically aligned and I was able to make everyone’s bed before school. All day long, as I glimpsed those smooth surfaces, I felt a sense of peace and accomplishment. They were the only clear expanses in my otherwise messy and chaotic house. Wanting more of that, I set that as my daily goal.
Time has melted away, like it always does in motherhood. Somehow, my kids have turned twelve, ten and six in a blink of an eye. Along with them growing up comes an increase in their responsibilities. Some things that were on my plate have shifted to theirs. Making their own beds before school is now their job.
The other day, when I passed by all those made beds, I flashed back to that day five years ago. I stopped in the hallway and let that feeling of peace and accomplishment wash over me. However, right behind came the memory of all the frustration and defeat I felt during the years in between. In that moment, standing in my hallway, I wished I could have told my old self to relax and quit striving; those beds did get made in due time.
Unfortunately I can’t; no one can turn back time. But I can learn. I can realize that whatever I’m longing for now, whatever I’m endlessly spinning my wheels to achieve, will probably happen, in due time. Circumstances always change. My kids are far less needy now than they were five years ago. Five years from now, they’ll be that much more independent.
It’s a new year: a chance to create new goals and have new aspirations. Being me, I tend to go overboard with my New Year Resolutions. I have a list a mile long of hopes and dreams I want to accomplish. However, if I want things to be different, I need to be more realistic about what is and isn’t possible, based on this season of my life.
I’ll still try hard to improve, learn and grow. But I’m only going to work towards what’s truly attainable. And when I miss the mark (because I know I will), I want to extend grace to myself. I want to do away with needless frustration. If I can’t achieve some things this year, I have to humble myself and hope that perhaps I’ll achieve them… in due time.
Questions For Reflection:
* Have I set some goals for myself in the past that just weren’t realistic, based on the circumstances then?
* What are the goals I am setting for myself now?
* Are they truly realistic for this season of my life?
* If/when I don’t succeed, can I extend grace to myself, knowing that most things will happen, in due time?
Shifting My Perspective 
I hear you! We want to be the best mom, wife, daughter, neighbor, and do it all. I’ve never been one to have NY resolutions…is that a bad thing? I don’t know. I don’t write down goals…I don’t set them either….I guess it’s the fear of failure. I am not sure? More and more, I want to keep things simple. And if I get to it, whatever “it” is, great. If not, oh well. Trying to experience more with my girls and my husband so as not to speed through everything and regret it later. I hope I get it right! 🙂
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I think your goals are perfect, Sandra. It doesn’t get better than experiencing more with your girls and husband. Here’s wishing you success in 2017 🙂
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Thanks, Claire – same to you 🙂
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You post was eye opening into how I find myself frustrated when I’m not able to accomplish something within my day as a wife and mom. Thank You
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Thanks for sharing that, Jeaniria. It always encourages me when I find out I’m not alone. I hope you stop by and comment often 🙂
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I love this post! I am definitely trying to not sweat the small stuff and know that it will all get taken care of eventually. This is difficult for a Type-A! 🙂 This is a great reminder to stop myself, take a breath and enjoy life a little more instead of trying to just keep up with everything. Thanks Claire!
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You nailed it Pam! Sometimes I feel like the captain of the Type-A Club!!! Let’s continue to inspire each other to relax on our A tendencies, and work more on enjoying all the blessings in our lives.
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So glad you see the need to slow down and take things as they come! Time goes too quickly and it is so easy to forget to enjoy the moment and push on to the next commitment. Even slowing down, you accomplish more than most people!! You amaze me with all you do!!
God bless you for all that you bring to the lives you touch. Love you. xo
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Said by one who runs circles around me, and still makes time for everyone! Oh how I aspire to be like you, Mom. Thanks for blessing us all 🙂
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Ohhh Claire, i am right where you were five years ago, so I can relate to this on sooo many levels! Everyone says to hang in there because they grow so fast so I’m learning/trying hard not to sweat the small things and enjoy my kids at this age :)God bless you and your family!
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So wonderful to have you comment, Nadjet! But sorry it’s to hear that you are experiencing what I did all those years ago. I think it’s a rare mom who can have little ones and not feel it. But just keep on doing what you’re doing, because you’re doing it right. I can tell you are an amazing mom by who your son is: a sweet and gentle soul, and a joy to be around. 🙂
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