All scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness… 2 Timothy 3:16
Last week, on vacation, my husband and kids did something to really piss me off. I’m too embarrassed now to admit what it was because, in retrospect, it was pretty minor. But in the moment, I was all fired up about it.
It happened while pausing on the long walk back to our car. In my self-righteous snit, I spun on my heels and marched away to the car by myself. I purposefully did so at a fast enough pace to leave them all in the dust.
My little ploy worked. They all came straggling up, one at a time, and apologized. I felt vindicated in my approach. The rest of the day sailed along smoothly, and we all were happy.
The next day we went to Boda Borg together. It’s a place where you need out-of-the-box thinking, physical stamina and great teamwork to solve the multiple puzzles and obstacle courses in each room to complete certain quests.
Our little family is full of dominating alpha-males, me included. We all think we should be in charge, we yell a lot, and we’re impatient. A different mom would have known not to bother. But this mom thought it would be a great way to work out those flaws and rise above.
It was a roller coaster of progress. But I’m thrilled to report that every time we clashed, crashed and burned, we tweaked and recovered. Until that one time…
Again, no need to go into detail, but Zack was the target. I was astounded when his reaction was to literally disappear.
As I went on the hunt for him, I was fuming. I’ve never allowed my kids to just walk away from an altercation. That’s not how we work through things, learn and grow. With every step I took, the speech I was preparing for him grew and grew.
Then it hit me: He was copying my tactic from the day before. I had role-modeled for him how to walk away from conflict, and manipulate people in the process. Shame on me!
I believe God is trying to teach and refine us every step of the way. He does so through subtle signs that multiply if we’re not paying attention or don’t take the necessary actions to learn, change and grow. Have you ever wondered why you suddenly hear the same message three different times: once in a song, once from a friend, once from a book or the internet? That’s Him, and that’s your growing point.
I find that the more committed I am to this journey of learning and refining myself, the less subtle God is. It’s no longer a recurring message in a song; It’s my kids mirroring back my bad choices and behavior. It can be a bit painful, and oh so humbling, but boy is it effective.
Needless to say, I couldn’t fault Zack for his reaction; I had to own the blame myself. Instead, I found him, hugged away his frustration, brought him back into the fold, and we continued questing.
Questions for Reflection:
* Is there a growing point God is highlighting for me through multiple venues?
* Is there a character flaw I possess that I see mirrored back through my kids?