I love the Lord, for He heard my voice; He heard my cry for mercy. Psalm 116:1

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The other day, Zack was going on and on about a level he created in Geometry Dash. Pretending to listen, I emptied the dishwasher and thought about that day’s line up, at the same time responding with “aha,” “aha,” whenever it seemed appropriate. Jocelyn interrupted Zack and said, “Mommy isn’t interested in video games.” Zack responded, “I know. But she’s nice enough to pretend she is.” The exchange actually had me laughing out loud: First, because my seven-year-old completely called me out. And, second, because my thirteen-year-old knew I wasn’t really listening, but barreled ahead anyways.
It got me thinking… Continue reading

My kids come up with the craziest ideas. Although I nod my head and say, “Hmmm… maybe…,” I know it’s not feasible to box up their dinners and send them to the starving children in Africa. I also presume Taylor Swift is never going to come to a birthday party, no matter how much we want her to. And, despite appreciating their creativity, I’m positive that building a water slide from their bedroom window to a pool we don’t even have just isn’t feasible.
I live in an affluent town where a lot of women put great emphasis on outward appearances: looking fit and slim, wearing the right clothes, driving the right car, etc. One of these women is arrogant and mean. In subtle, passive-aggressive ways, she tries to make me feel inferior so she can feel superior.
Zack had some friends over to play Dungeons and Dragons over the weekend. None of the kids he invited had ever played before, but Zack was soooo excited to teach them. With his expectations so high, I knew he would be crushed if the game didn’t go over well.
If I don’t tackle big projects over the weekend, they take FOREVER during the week. With three kids, and their homework and activities, I’m constantly having to stop what I’m doing to help them. The weekday me becomes very inefficient, and things are always left undone.
I’m not quite sure why, but I always thought I was supposed to have all the answers. It didn’t come from an arrogant place of thinking I knew it all; it came from an insecure place of feeling stupid when I was clueless. It branched out to all areas of my life: current events, career, social interactions, motherhood, you name it. I wasn’t completely ignorant. In fact, I graduated college with a high grade point average. It’s just that it’s impossible to know everything; yet I wasn’t confident enough to admit that.