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Pervasive Weeds

“The kingdom of heaven may be likened to a man who sowed good seed in his field. While everyone was asleep, his enemy came and sowed weeds all through the wheat, and went off.”   Matthew 13:24-25

SAMSUNG CAMERA PICTURESSeptember to June was so insanely busy, I burnt myself out in every area of my life. Being the extremist I am, I’ve swung the pendulum in the complete opposite direction this summer. In fact, I’ve swung it so far, I don’t even recognize myself.

I used to be so organized and efficient; now I barely answer emails. I used to be a neat freak with plenty of OCD tendencies; now my house is such a disaster, my husband even commented the other morning, “This place is a mess!” (You need to have seen how disgusting his apartment was when we were dating to get the enormity of this statement.) I used to be so busy I never sat down; now I am at risk for roots growing out my backside, and some serious weight gain from all the inactivity. The thing that amazes me most is – I don’t care about any of it: my slacker attitude, my messy house, or my new couch potato status. It all feels like  a gift that is quenching the fires of burn out.

I am also learning so much about the error of my ways.
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Nurture Versus Nature

The things you have learned and received and heard and seen in me, practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you.    Phillippians 4:9

SAMSUNG CAMERA PICTURESMy girlfriends and I are doing kid swaps this summer. Jess is a teacher. So when she hosted the seven kids in June, she put on a Harry Potter Science Camp that was phenomenal! Pam is a personal trainer and has a pool. So her day in August will be “Sweat and Swim.” I hosted last Monday and did “The Way Back Machine.”

At my little camp, the seven kids had to make helmets out of tin foil that would receive the gamma rays from the Way Back Machine to be transported back in time. When we arrived in the 1950’s, we did 1950’s kid things: making portable phones out of paper cups and strings, playing Old Maid and Kick The Can, and drinking root beer floats. We also built a club house, complete with a secret password and knock to get in.

My three kids are incredibly imaginative. So I was floored by how little hands-on abilities they had. I also wasn’t ready for them to be so defeated by the smallest technical difficulty while building the club house.

One of the many gifts my mom passed on to my siblings and me is creative problem solving. There has yet to be a problem she hasn’t taught us to solve. Even when I thought there was no possible way to get my couch up to the second floor in our old 1925 house with a 90 degree turn in the staircase, my Mom arrived on our door step, with my Dad, with all the tools necessary to cut the couch in half, bring it up the stairs, and reassemble it there.

I thought I was passing those same problem solving skills on to my kids, but the clubhouse construction challenges underscored that I haven’t.

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Not Until It’s Gone…

“So do not worry and say, ‘What are we to eat?’ or ‘What are we to drink?’ or ‘What are we to wear?'”   Matthew 6:31

SAMSUNG CAMERA PICTURESLast Thursday, when I turned on the sink to wash my hands, no water came out. I have to admit, I was more than unsettled by it. It’s not uncommon for our town to lose power, and therefore water, as most of us have wells with pumps that require electricity to work. But we had power that day.

They are constructing thirty new homes just two streets away. The scuttlebutt in our neighborhood is that all those new wells they are putting in will deplete our water table. Naturally my next thought was that our well had run dry. That put me in panic mode. Yes, I lived in a third world country for years where water was always in short supply. But I wasn’t a mom then. I have three kids now: between baths and showers, cooking and cleaning, and doing at least one load of laundry a day, we rely heavily on running water. How were we going to function?
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Back Deck Summer

“People do not put new wine into old wineskins. Otherwise the skins burst, the wine spills out, and the skins are ruined. Rather, they pour new wine into fresh wineskins, and both are preserved.”   Matthew 9:17

SAMSUNG CAMERA PICTURESBack in 2008, when my boys were little and full of energy, I started “Adventure Summer.” Every day, Monday to Friday, July through August, we’d get in the car and drive someplace new. To heighten the fun, I wouldn’t tell them where we were going, or what we were doing.

The system worked beautifully for us: it kept me focused on quality time with my kids (rather than doing laundry or emptying the dishwasher at home), and it gave my boys an outlet for all that little boy energy. In fact, it worked so well for us, we’ve kept “Adventure Summer” going ever since. But things have changed… 

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Holding My Kids Close

There is an appointed time for everything,… a time to embrace…   Ecclesiastes 3:1 & 5

SAMSUNG CAMERA PICTURESThe school year is jam packed for us with band practice, karate, track, Drama Club, dance, floor hockey, Game Club, CCD, Daisy Girl Scouts, etc. I may be the one driving and picking up for it all, but I don’t participate in any of it. That is hours and hours of the week that I am not in the company of my kids. The only time I get to spend with them is during homework, where I am constantly riding them to stay focused, or at dinner, where I am pushing them to eat faster so we can get to the next activity. How sad is that?

So when summer comes, I get so excited, I plan all these great adventures where we can be together. Then I invite my kids’ friends to come along. It’s completely counterproductive: when their friends are there, my kids choose to talk to them, over me, every time. I can’t blame them: when the moms come along, I talk with the moms more than my own kids every time too.

So I decided I wanted last Wednesday to be different.

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It’s Not For Us To Worry

“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life…” Matthew 6:25

SAMSUNG CAMERA PICTURESOn the long list of what I want for each of my kids is a small and close circle of good friends. I don’t need them to be the most popular kids in school. I just want them to have a few friends that they can have fun with, can lean on, and who share our same values.

Consequently, I try to foster and nurture friendships with the good kids we cross paths with. I work hard at constantly scheduling and driving my kids to playdates. But over the years, I’ve learned that no matter how hard I try, I can’t always control my kids’ friendships. Whether their interests shift, their class rosters change, or it’s just the natural order of things, some friendships wane, and kids grow apart.

Add to that the umpteen challenges of Middle School, and Zack’s circle is dwindling. The biggest blow is his newest and sweetest friend is moving to Texas. Not only is my heart breaking for Zack, but now I’m really starting to worry.

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The Big Difference A Small Word Of Kindness Can Make

Is He not the One… who shows no partiality to princes and does not favor the rich over the poor, for they are all the work of His hands?    Job 34:18-19

SAMSUNG CAMERA PICTURESIn High School and summers during college, I worked a plethora of jobs: cashier at a grocery store, bus girl at a restaurant, chamber maid at a hotel, ad type setter for a local newspaper, piece driller at a welding shop, you name it. All of these jobs taught me something: either a new skill, or what it’s like to walk in the shoes of the people who do these jobs full time. What stayed with me most were the feelings of being invisible and taken advantage of.

Very few people even acknowledged my existence when I was bussing tables. They had no idea that I was President of my High School class, on the honor roll, and had hopes and dreams of saving the world. And the way some people left their hotel rooms when I was a chambermaid would absolutely nauseate you. It was as if I were beneath them, just a lowly dog that was fortunate to get to clean up after them. Although I didn’t enjoy these experiences, they taught me what to do, and what not to do.

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Calling On The Warrior

For this very reason, make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge; and to knowledge, self-control…”          2 Peter 1:5-6

SAMSUNG CAMERA PICTURESBathing suit season is here, and I am not ready! In January 2015, I was scared onto the straight and narrow path by my doctor. I exercised, ate right, and by default, lost weight. By that summer, I felt like a million bucks – especially when my blood work came back and all my health issues were under control.

So I celebrated by diving head first into a family sized bag of Smartfood popcorn, with a side of Veggie Chips for good measure. Of all the junk food options out there, they’re on the healthier side, right? At least that was my rationale. Not worried about my health anymore, I haven’t stopped this celebratory eating for twelve months straight.

Needless to say, I’ve gained back all that weight, and then some. I thought I possessed self-control. Turns out I only do when I fear for my health. Although I don’t want another health scare, I do miss that self-control.
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Code Words Aren’t Just For Secret Agents

So I will always remind you of these things, even though you know and are firmly established in the truth you now have. 2 Peter:12

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A few years ago, when we kept missing the school bus in the morning, I found a way to beat the system. I learned that Horseshoe Road was on our bus route, two streets after ours. As it literally is a horseshoe, I’d drive down the opposite end and pull up wherever I saw children still standing in their driveways waiting for the bus. Although my kids were embarrassed that I’d pull up to random children and driveways, our driver thought it was very funny. She started referring to us as “Where’s Waldo,” because she never knew where we’d show up.

After multiple mornings of having to scream at my kids that we were running late, I shouted out the single word “Horseshoe!” It was amazing how just that one word caught their attention, got them to focus, and most importantly, got them to hustle. When we didn’t miss the bus that morning, I knew I was on to something. I started referring to my little trick as “Code Word Horseshoe,” and I used it any time we were running late for anything.

Although I haven’t used that code word in years, Zack resurrected the code word concept recently when he was struggling with a writing assignment. Continue reading →

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The Reflection In “My Little Mirror”

Direct my footsteps according to Your word; let no sin rule over me.       Psalm 119:133

SAMSUNG CAMERA PICTURESI definitely have OCD tendencies. Lately, I find they’re rubbing off on my kids. I see it in how Jocelyn has taken over our front hall closet.

The boys just kick off their shoes, creating a heap on the closet floor. On a routine basis, Jocelyn takes it upon herself to pair up everyone’s shoes and place them in an orderly fashion on the shoe rack. It’s awesome! I love to open the closet door and see what used to be chaos, now all neat and organized.

But the best was when I opened the closet the other day to get my flip flops. I found that Jocelyn had placed each of her flip flops inside each of mine. I automatically thought, “Aaaww, she wants to follow in my footsteps.” My heart swelled with love and pride.

But immediately following, I felt the weight of responsibility: Am I being a good example for her to follow? Of course I know that my kids copy what I do, but that copying is happening now, as children. What if, as an adult, Jocelyn walks the same path I am walking as a mom, would I be happy with her choices?

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